WHAT’S THE AFFAIR WITH HAIR?

When did you realize you were a hairaholic?

For me, my realization came at a very early age. I remember as a little girl, someone, usually an older relative would always have the cause to say to me ‘take your hands out of your hair!’.

I was always fascinated with hair… my own hair as well as others hair…I loved looking at (sometimes touching) other people’s hair.

I vividly remember one day back in high school, standing in a cafeteria line I felt the urge to touch another girl’s ponytail… omg, it looked so thick and luscious! Her ponytail was golden and tailbone length…I just couldn’t help myself. She was one form under me. I remember without thinking, reaching out and touching her ponytail.  I learned a very important lesson that day…some people don’t like their hair touched by strangers. Lol. She turned around and with the most piercing eyes ever, stared angrily at me for about 10 seconds. I was so mortified I apologized profusely.

So what’s the affair with hair? What’s this fascination that has made the black hair industry worth over 2.5B$ worldwide and according to some sources black women outspend other races up to 6 times more in Hair Care?

Personally, I made the decision to stop chemically relaxing my hair about 5 years ago and from that time to now, we have been seeing more and more women embracing and or returning to their natural hair. This has allowed me to do quite a lot of self and social reflection regarding our hair and the relationship we innately have with our natural tresses.

As most little girls, I’ve always wanted long hair.

I mean, which little girl does not want long hair? I’m sure you will identify when I say I would often drift off in my mind…imagining and daydreaming as young girls do, that my hair was long, straight and flowing. If not long and straight, long, and curly but with big ringlets. It seemed a natural desire, I mean after all, that’s the images of beauty we were exposed to!

Growing up in multicultural T&T there were lots of hair types to admire.

It was no secret however that some textures were more appreciated than others. The ones with the ‘good hair’. Unfortunately, the ones that were given the bad rap and negative connotations were the hair types with tighter curl patterns; the kinky curl, the hair type that shrunk, that would be subject to derogatory terms such as  “picky” or ‘late for school hair’. Do you remember those terms? The type that had to be brushed and gelled profusely or heat pressed, blow dried or chemically straightened into submission. The hair type that I and many other little girls identified with.

The thing is that this was not reserved to T&T, this bias seemed to be the generalized perception! I loved looking at movies and fashion magazines. I loved beautiful pictures and pretty early on it was clear to me that my hair type was not being sensationalized on television, in commercials, programs or in print media, particular hair types were not aligned with beauty.

Even our most treasured characters, the princesses we wanted to be like and the popular dolls we desired to play with were not representative of my kinky curls.

Closer to home, women, men, boys, and girls had views on what a beautiful head of hair looked like and that hair strand better be “mixed”. The softer or straight or mixed with other races Ie not pure “African” or “Afro” type hair, the prettier the hair, the prettier the person was deemed to be. I know you can relate.

Do you remember hair also being associated with certain rites of passage? Many young girls of African descent learnt that from plaits, cornrows or canerows as we called them in Trinidad and Tobago, you transitioned to heat pressing or blow drying. Then at an appropriate age we would be given the ‘gift’ of a relaxed head of hair. On a lesser scale, some of us would have had a jerry or S curl but a relaxer was the real deal.

Your first relaxer! The coming-of-age present!

For some it came earlier or a few years later, but it was almost like a teenage rite of passage in order to be a beautiful girl. This event would normally come around the age of 13….right after Common Entrance (now called SEA) for a grand entrance into secondary school, or just in time for graduation from Secondary school.. Boy was there excitement around receiving your first relaxer! Not much compared.

We would envision the length and flow, the styles we would attempt, the reaction of our friends and how beautiful we would finally be.

Why?

This was the general perception of beauty growing up in the 80’s and 90’s. Our natural hair was neither liked nor appreciated. We have come a long way! Agreed? We are now in an era of #blackgirlmagic. An era where we have come to love our African/ black identity and everything associated with it…including our natural, non-chemically treated, beautiful and healthy hair.

I’m sure you can agree with me when I say that it was not until later in life did I fully grow to love and appreciate the hair that grows naturally out of my scalp. I then learned about the proper treatment and care for my natural hair and when I learned to properly care for my hair, I fell in love all over again.

With this new revolution information, techniques, treatment options and our hair is stronger and healthier and for the little girl in me…longer than ever before.

What’s the affair with hair? What has brought about this new and improved mindset and unconditional love and appreciation for what is ours?

What are some of the negative connotations you have heard growing up that led you to develop certain perspectives about your hair and yourself?